Help How to make SN quieter and more effective?

[hematomatema]

I intend on CTBing tonight at the very latest because there isn't any other time I can do it (won't be able to for a week or two from now, and by then Christmas will be coming up) but at the same time, doing it tonight means doing it in my home which also means around other people (my parents.)

I've heard that SN is a relatively loud process with vomiting and gurgling and agonal breathing so I need to try and silence it as much as possible. I expect doing it around 1-2AM will mean that my parents are in as deep a sleep as possible, so they may not wake up from any noises I make. The smell and sound of the vomiting is an issue so I've thought about just grabbing a towel, laying face down, and covering my mouth so it doesn't spill onto my bed and so that it muffles the sound a little bit. Might also shove fabric underneath my door to further silence the process. Not sure what I'll be able to do about myself when I inevitably go unconscious and start seizing though, because my bed is quite creaky and even the slightest movement is audible, let alone seizing to death. Maybe I do it on the floor?

As for efficacy, I'm not really sure what to do. I've eaten today which is definitely an issue, so I might just take the full satchet of SN so more is absorbed and quicker. Other than that, I'm out of ideas. Does anyone have any recommendations they can give me for making it quicker, quieter, and more likely to actually work? I need to have it done tonight so there's 0 alternative.

 

[hematomatema]

bump for visibility, have 2 hours to go so any last minute recommendations are much appreciated

 

[JustSomeWeirdo]

I intend on CTBing tonight at the very latest because there isn't any other time I can do it (won't be able to for a week or two from now, and by then Christmas will be coming up) but at the same time, doing it tonight means doing it in my home which also means around other people (my parents.)

I've heard that SN is a relatively loud process with vomiting and gurgling and agonal breathing so I need to try and silence it as much as possible. I expect doing it around 1-2AM will mean that my parents are in as deep a sleep as possible, so they may not wake up from any noises I make. The smell and sound of the vomiting is an issue so I've thought about just grabbing a towel, laying face down, and covering my mouth so it doesn't spill onto my bed and so that it muffles the sound a little bit. Might also shove fabric underneath my door to further silence the process. Not sure what I'll be able to do about myself when I inevitably go unconscious and start seizing though, because my bed is quite creaky and even the slightest movement is audible, let alone seizing to death. Maybe I do it on the floor?

As for efficacy, I'm not really sure what to do. I've eaten today which is definitely an issue, so I might just take the full satchet of SN so more is absorbed and quicker. Other than that, I'm out of ideas. Does anyone have any recommendations they can give me for making it quicker, quieter, and more likely to actually work? I need to have it done tonight so there's 0 alternative.

Well I can help with what I've hearing from this method. Expect to get dizzy. And feel some discomfort. Wish you well on your journey to peace. (Or in my case, freedom)

 

[dontlook]

I intend on CTBing tonight at the very latest because there isn't any other time I can do it (won't be able to for a week or two from now, and by then Christmas will be coming up) but at the same time, doing it tonight means doing it in my home which also means around other people (my parents.)

I've heard that SN is a relatively loud process with vomiting and gurgling and agonal breathing so I need to try and silence it as much as possible. I expect doing it around 1-2AM will mean that my parents are in as deep a sleep as possible, so they may not wake up from any noises I make. The smell and sound of the vomiting is an issue so I've thought about just grabbing a towel, laying face down, and covering my mouth so it doesn't spill onto my bed and so that it muffles the sound a little bit. Might also shove fabric underneath my door to further silence the process. Not sure what I'll be able to do about myself when I inevitably go unconscious and start seizing though, because my bed is quite creaky and even the slightest movement is audible, let alone seizing to death. Maybe I do it on the floor?

As for efficacy, I'm not really sure what to do. I've eaten today which is definitely an issue, so I might just take the full satchet of SN so more is absorbed and quicker. Other than that, I'm out of ideas. Does anyone have any recommendations they can give me for making it quicker, quieter, and more likely to actually work? I need to have it done tonight so there's 0 alternative.

I'm so sorry it's come to such a rushed end

What youve said already sounds like it would help, I'm mostly wanting to tell you that I'm thinking of you and I hope you can transition smoothly

Will you be documenting the process?

 

[hematomatema]

I'm so sorry it's come to such a rushed end

What youve said already sounds like it would help, I'm mostly wanting to tell you that I'm thinking of you and I hope you can transition smoothly

Will you be documenting the process?

Probably not, I've heard the symptoms start fast enough that I probably wouldn't be able to accurately describe them in time before I go unconscious or feel too uncomfortable to keep typing. If I survive and remember it all though, I would document it in another thread.

 

[tbh2023]

I intend on CTBing tonight at the very latest because there isn't any other time I can do it (won't be able to for a week or two from now, and by then Christmas will be coming up) but at the same time, doing it tonight means doing it in my home which also means around other people (my parents.)

I've heard that SN is a relatively loud process with vomiting and gurgling and agonal breathing so I need to try and silence it as much as possible. I expect doing it around 1-2AM will mean that my parents are in as deep a sleep as possible, so they may not wake up from any noises I make. The smell and sound of the vomiting is an issue so I've thought about just grabbing a towel, laying face down, and covering my mouth so it doesn't spill onto my bed and so that it muffles the sound a little bit. Might also shove fabric underneath my door to further silence the process. Not sure what I'll be able to do about myself when I inevitably go unconscious and start seizing though, because my bed is quite creaky and even the slightest movement is audible, let alone seizing to death. Maybe I do it on the floor?

As for efficacy, I'm not really sure what to do. I've eaten today which is definitely an issue, so I might just take the full satchet of SN so more is absorbed and quicker. Other than that, I'm out of ideas. Does anyone have any recommendations they can give me for making it quicker, quieter, and more likely to actually work? I need to have it done tonight so there's 0 alternative.

Death is painful regardless to what method. I'm using sn and I know it won't be peaceful but I gotta leave in some type of way. Good luck with whatever you end up deciding.

 

[hematomatema]

Death is painful regardless to what method. I'm using sn and I know it won't be peaceful but I gotta leave in some type of way. Good luck with whatever you end up deciding.

Eh, I've seen the list of experiences on this site and it varies. Loads say it doesn't hurt besides a mild burn at the back of the throat when drinking it, awful aftertaste, discomfort, and of course the act of vomiting which isn't pleasant, but there's only really a few that seem to say that it actually hurt-hurts. I think it depends on how fast you go unconscious. Even then, if it hurts, it is what it is. Not so worried about it because I'll be unresponsive ten minutes after feeling that pain - I'm fine with that. It's just that I need to make it as quiet as possible so no one hears the process. Might just wrap myself up in blanket and lay face down so I don't make noise when I struggle.

 

[tbh2023]

Eh, I've seen the list of experiences on this site and it varies. Loads say it doesn't hurt besides a mild burn at the back of the throat when drinking it, awful aftertaste, discomfort, and of course the act of vomiting which isn't pleasant, but there's only really a few that seem to say that it actually hurt-hurts. I think it depends on how fast you go unconscious. Even then, if it hurts, it is what it is. Not so worried about it because I'll be unresponsive ten minutes after feeling that pain - I'm fine with that. It's just that I need to make it as quiet as possible so no one hears the process. Might just wrap myself up in blanket and lay face down so I don't make noise when I struggle.

I'm so sorry that you have to go this direction too. I wish you peace with your decision. That's why I hate life. It's very cruel we end up suffering or leaving in a very challenge way. You're in my thoughts

 

[panda55]

Wish you a peaceful journey my friend.

 

[hematomatema]

Screw it. Drank it too late but oh well. Taken as of 1 minute ago. I'll update in symptoms as got. Unknown measurements for water, but around 30g(?) of nitrite used.

Description of ingestion: It smells so chemically, and fizzed upon mixing with my water and squash. I hope that's not a bad thing. Smelt like it would burn my nose hairs. Tasted...fine? Nowhere near as bad as it smelled, a mild burn on the back of the throat, but more of a kiss than anything. Just hold your nose when you drink, because the smell made my eyes burn. Difficult to drink cause body tries to throw it up as you drink. Chemically burps. First symptom. I'm so scared.
Near vomiting but I haven't finished the glass yet. Fuck.
Am holding it down somewhat OK so far. I'll try and go in for another sip.
Weird stomach discomfort and feeling on face but I haven't taken anymore than 5g so far. FUCCCKKK I'm so scared. Burps get more chemically. I'm so scared.
How the fuck do I finish this last but off? I could hardly manage a fifth of it. Heart feels weird. Might be the adrenaline though.

 

[dontlook]

Good luck, I'm sorry it's come to this. We're here for you

 

[hematomatema]

No pain yet. Everything just feels slightly off, like when you have a really nasty cold.

 

[dontlook]

No pain yet. Everything just feels slightly off, like when you have a really nasty cold.

Did you manage to take the rest? It's important to follow protocol if you're sure about this. You can always stop and call for help if you aren't.

 

[NearlyIrrelevantCake]

Godspeed.

 

[hematomatema]

No vomiting yet and I don't think it'll come to it if I don't drink the rest.

Did you manage to take the rest? It's important to follow protocol if you're sure about this. You can always stop and call for help if you aren't.

Too late to call for help, I'll have to take the rest.
It's so tough to drink though FUCK I can't handle the smell of it. Also don't mix with squash, mine turned deep yellow urine colour. IDK why but I don't think it'll matter
Vomiting may start soon.

 

[dontlook]

No vomiting yet and I don't think it'll come to it if I don't drink the rest.

Too late to call for help, I'll have to take the rest.

It definitely isn't too late. People have been found and saved farther into the process and with higher doses than this. There are treatments that reverse the effects.

 

[hematomatema]

How do I drink the rest without vomiting? I can't even put my face near the glass.
Gagged but no vomit. Next time will not be so lucky I fearm
I can't drink the rest, the taste and smell become too overpowering if you don't do it immediately.
Heart is pounding now but nothing happened yet FUCK WHAT DO I DO
Nearly vomited again

 

[maniac116]

It's not too late to call Emergency services..no shame!

 

[hematomatema]

Not calling EMS. Must go through. Either toughing it out or dying.
Just vomited a lot. Attempt presumably unsuccessful but I don't know. Vomit smells like nitrite. A lot. I don't know what to do

 

[TyGuy5]

Did you take any meds with it or did you fast at all? I hope you're doing ok, whether that be at peace or backing out.

 

[hematomatema]

Did you take any meds with it or did you fast at all? I hope you're doing ok, whether that be at peace or backing out.

Domperidonenas an antiemetic. That was it
Symptoms are starting to decrease, I have to assume that it hasn't worked.
Heart beating loudly in neck and ear.

 

[opheliaoveragain]

We're here with you. Did you fast?

 

[hematomatema]

We're here with you. Did you fast?

No, although from how long I held down the nitrite and from how little I drank, I think if you took maybe 10-20g you'd not need to fast and you'd absorb most before vomiting.

 

[opheliaoveragain]

How are you feeling now? I read upthread you assumed it didn't work. Following protocol is really important, I recognize that it can be hard. Sorry you went through this.

 

[hematomatema]

Does methemoglobin get reconverted on its own?

How are you feeling now? I read upthread you assumed it didn't work. Following protocol is really important, I recognize that it can be hard. Sorry you went through this.

Less symptoms now. No more vomiting since I assume it all came up.
Any movement causes my heart to beat so loudly in my head and my room now stinks of SN fumes. Opened window to dissipate smell.
God it really saps energy from you if unsuccessful. It's over now but I feel like I ran a marathon. Arm feels weak even just typing.
Gonna try again later, I can stay home for a bit longer, plus I left enough for a second try and my stomach is now empty

 

[dontlook]

Does methemoglobin get reconverted on its own?

Less symptoms now. No more vomiting since I assume it all came up.
Any movement causes my heart to beat so loudly in my head and my room now stinks of SN fumes. Opened window to dissipate smell.
God it really saps energy from you if unsuccessful. It's over now but I feel like I ran a marathon. Arm feels weak even just typing.
Gonna try again later, I can stay home for a bit longer, plus I left enough for a second try and my stomach is now empty

I'm sorry you're having to go through this

 

[hematomatema]

Do not move if you fail your OD, or at least minimise any voluntary movements. I think that my blood isn't able to carry enough oxygen around so every time I do my heart rate skyrockets. Even typing consumes so much energy. Genuinely feels like I've been in a marathon.
God I hope the methaemoglobin gets reconverted soon. I know there's an enzyme responsible for doing that but given how rough I feel after an hour or so it can't be doing it quickly.

 

[dontlook]

Your O2 is probably low and it could become dangerous. Do you have a oximeter? If you aren't planning to call emergency services it might be best to lie down with your legs propped, rest if you can, and sip water if possible

 

[hematomatema]

Your O2 is probably low and it could become dangerous. Do you have a oximeter? If you aren't planning to call emergency services it might be best to lie down with your legs propped, rest if you can, and sip water if possible

No oximeter, it's definitely not getting worse but I do think my O2 is low, yeah. Surprising given I can't have consumed more than 5g of SN but then again I held it down for a while. Have been sipping water, most thankful for the fact that I can only hardly taste the SN in my mouth now. Absolutely foul aftertaste.
Mild twitching in left arm if held at certain angle.
Interestingly, absolutely 0 pain from this, it's just a reeaaaallllly uncomfortable process

 

[dontlook]

No oximeter, it's definitely not getting worse but I do think my O2 is low, yeah. Surprising given I can't have consumed more than 5g of SN but then again I held it down for a while. Have been sipping water, most thankful for the fact that I can only hardly taste the SN in my mouth now. Absolutely foul aftertaste.
Mild twitching in left arm if held at certain angle.
Interestingly, absolutely 0 pain from this, it's just a reeaaaallllly uncomfortable process

No pain despite no pain relievers? That is interesting. Maybe bc such a low dose