Suicide prevention (funny answers only)

[SchizoGymnast]

Stop being an asshole
Provide emotional support cat

What are your ideas?

 

[Seered Doom]

Don't be a pissy missy

 

[Rynalia]

More espresso less depresso

 

[Saturn_]

stop trauma dumping????????????

 

[2messdup]

Don't be a pissy missy

That's funny as hell

More espresso less depresso

Love these

 

[SchizoGymnast]

More vodka please

 

[Parasitism]

Cheer up, it might never happen

 

[SchizoGymnast]

Have you tried getting a boyfriend?

 

[EmptyBottle]

Don't die, go dry (doubles as some sobriety phrase)

 

[LaetumCat]

dont die, that shit kills you!!

 

[hippiedeath]

You got too much pain on the brain

 

[EmptyBottle]

"Want to die? In under 80 years, you probably will"

 

[Pluto]

 

[leloyon]

*BANG*
another job well done boys, cant commit suicide if someone kills you first.

 

[The Morningstar]

Turn them into a quadruple amputee and give them a feeding tube + IV.
Oh, wait, "funny," uhhhhhhhhhhh...

 

[tormentedhusk]

Death will happen anyway. Why bother?

 

[amerie]

You're too thicc to kill yourself, I will miss hearing your big juicy ass clap within a 5 mile radius if you pass, especially with the rise of ozempic

 

[tormentedhusk]